Tag / I see you

by Nathan Coumbe

People stay where they grow

This is one of my favorite lines from Zig Ziglar. 

But I want to talk about my own take on the idea:

People stay where they are nurtured. 

A garden, when it’s planted, will only grow if regularly tended, watered, fertilized… In short, when it’s shown love and care.

People are the same way: 

  • They’ll stay with employers who help them grow
  • They’ll stay with partners who love and cherish them
  • They’ll engage with parents who show unconditional love and affection

But unlike plants, we have the ability to move on. 

Plants, if not nurtured, wither and die. They’re stuck where they’re planted.

But humans can move on. We have the ability to uproot ourselves and move to more fertile ground if we aren’t getting what we need in our current situation.

We need to remember this when thinking of our relationships with others.

by Nathan Coumbe

Change your story, change your results

Each of us has an internal narrative constantly chattering about who we are. 

But what we don’t always realize is that internal narrative influences how we behave.

If you tell yourself the story that, “Overeating makes me feel happy,” that story might be a stand-in for the real story—“I’m unhappy with different aspects of my life and overeating gives me a small dose of pleasure.”

Until you realize this, you’ll continue to overeat and live on greasy fast food multiple times each week.

(I know this because it’s a story I’m trying to rewrite myself). 

If you tell yourself a story that says, “I’m not skilled at sales or business,” you might never realize your unresolved dream of starting your own venture and working for yourself. 

The first step to overcoming many of our chronic issues is to start telling ourselves a different story. 

Changing what you do starts by changing your identity—who you believe yourself to be. 

Change the story, change the person.

by Nathan Coumbe

The extra mile might be too far

I doubt you have kept track of how many times people have told you to “go the extra mile.” In the spirit of influence, I’ll ask you anyway:

How many times have you been told to “go the extra mile?” Perhaps you work in customer service or sales; perhaps you’re married and want to do more for your spouse; maybe you really want to please your boss on the next project.

Here’s the thing: a mile is really long when you start trying to walk or run it. It’s tough, so tough most people would rather not make the attempt than start down the mile and stop before completion.

There is really good news:

YOU DON’T HAVE TO GO THE EXTRA MILE.

Hear me clearly on this: I am not saying that you should be lazy or merely do your job. What I mean is the smallest extra step in however you serve others can have dramatic results.

Here is an example:

A customer approached a clerk in the grocery store asking where a particular item was located. What did the clerk do? He might have pointed to the correct aisle and gone back to stocking his shelf. But instead, the clerk said, “Follow me!” and led the same customer two aisles over and pointed out the exact item in question.

The clerk didn’t go the extra mile. At most, he went a few extra yards. He served that customer in the smallest of ways; instead of letting the customer wander for a minute more or spend time on the correct aisle attempting to locate the item amongst dozens of others, he led the customer right to it. He saved, at most, a couple of minutes of time and a modicum of fustration for the customer. Not huge in the grand scheme of things, at least not for the clerk. But it made a lasting impact on the customer.

More Human

The clerk did one important, life-changing thing: he acted more human than was absolutely necessary. That small step impacted the customer more than the clerk would ever know; that small act told the customer, “I see a really easy way to serve you in the manner I know how. Here, let me help you.” A small, human kindness. He made a connection; he created a small but memorable experience.

It wasn’t difficult, but it was magical.

So don’t worry about the extra mile. Go the extra yard. Still too far?

Just take one extra step.

Start small. Be more human.

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