by Nathan Coumbe

What does it mean to “be proactive”?

If practiced regularly, the ideas behind these two words will change your life. 

To be proactive means to take responsibility and initiative in your life. 

Being proactive means making a choice; it is the most fundamental human right we have. Stephen R. Covey truly understood this when he read the words of Victor Frankl:

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

Victor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

Frankl himself was a prisoner of Nazi Germany during the Holocaust: he lost his wife and most of his family in the concentration camps. In one of the most degrading situations in which a human could find himself, he realized that he still had the power to choose how he responded to his tormentors and imprisonment. 

Even if everything was taken away from you – your health, your money, your freedom – you would still have the power of choice. 

You might ask how Frankl could still have had freedom when everything was taken away. The answer is that he had freedom within his own mind – he could choose how he responded to the events in his life, however horrible.

Each of us has within us the power to choose how we react. If there is a rough situation at work, an angry customer, or a disappointed spouse, there is still a split second in which you can decide how you will respond. 

Response-ability –– your ability to respond appropriately. 

How will you take responsibility for yourself today?

P.S. I highly recommend you pick up a copy of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and read the first few chapters, especially the chapter entitled “Be Proactive.” You will be amazed at the changes you experience in your everyday interactions.

by Nathan Coumbe

The one book I wish I had read before college…

I have decided that this blog will be dedicated to helping others live a more effective, curious, and creative life. To that end, I believe we should start with basic and universal principles of living a good life. There is one book I wish I had read before I began college: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Dr. Stephen R. Covey.

I first read the book when I was a junior at the University of Southern Mississippi, but I did not take it seriously. I simply believed I had more important obligations. Little did I know that had I practiced the fundamental principles contained within the book, I would have achieved more than I could have dreamed at 24 years old.

These are the seven habits:

  1. Be proactive.
  2. Begin with the end in mind.
  3. Put first things first.
  4. Think win-win.
  5. Seek first to understand, then be understood.
  6. Synergize.
  7. Sharpen the saw.

I will be exploring these in-depth in future posts. I hope that you will be inspired to live a more effective life as you follow along.

by Nathan Coumbe

Show up because it’s the right thing to do

Show up.

Every single day.

Just do it. (Sorry Nike).

This may sound like I’m trying to get you to go crush it at the gym, but I am not.

Whatever you feel called to do, however you feel called to do it, it will not happen unless you show up and do the work.

That may mean writing blog posts every single day whether or not the muse speaks to you. It may mean coaching an employee even if it isn’t a requirement of your job. It might mean practicing your instrument or drawing a quick sketch, even if you don’t feel inspired or if you’ve drawn something like it ten times before.

Showing up, getting your idea out into the world, helping just one other person simply by being there…it isn’t just good for you – it’s the right thing to do.

You never know when your work will get noticed; you just have to keep producing.

Show up. Because it is right.

by Nathan Coumbe

What if we have tutoring wrong?

Why did tutoring become something other than exploring one’s curiosity? According to Wikipedia, “Tutoring began as an informal and unstructured method of educational assistance, dating back to periods in Ancient Greece…[where] the main goal of the tutor was to impart knowledge to the learner in order to help the latter gain proficiency in the subject area.” They did not exist to help students who were struggling, but instead served as teachers who passed on knowledge and wisdom to pupils to make them better citizens of Greece. 

At some point, tutors became a tool for anxious parents concerned about their student’s falling grades, rather than a source of information and inspiration to satisfy a student’s curiosity. Now, the thought process is, “I’m struggling and need to get my grades up, so I should hire a tutor” rather than, “this subject is so fascinating to me that I cannot get enough information at school and must learn more. Who can help me?” 

About the only time this actually seems to happen is when a student seeks out a private teacher in a creative field, such as music or art. You don’t go to a private music teacher because you’re doing poorly in band; you go because you are so invested in your craft that you want to master every aspect you can.

(You could argue that SAT/ACT tutors also don’t help you when you are doing poorly, but I have yet to meet anyone who is passionately interested in standardized tests).

What is tutoring for? What could it be for?

by Nathan Coumbe

What if we all just stopped?

Is every single person born with the potential to be creative?

Yes.

So if we are all creative in some unique way (and we are), what would happen if we all stopped working in areas or jobs in which we felt obligated, and we all started working in our own areas of creative genius?

Does each of us have the potential to succeed in our unique creative gift? Is it that many of us never get the chance because of environmental factors or fear?

Could the marketplace support 100% engagement by all creatives? I think so; creativity doesn’t have to be writing, art, or music. Some people are creative in areas of building, business, leadership, plumbing, carpentry, or any other area that a modern society needs in order to thrive.

Food for thought.

by Nathan Coumbe

What are you afraid of?

Why haven’t you started yet? Why have you not launched your side-hustle? Or started tackling that new skill you need to get a new career?

Is it really the fear of failure? If you start a side-hustle and it fails, who cares? You didn’t lose your job. You aren’t out on the streets.

If you try to learn a new skill and find that you are completely uninterested or you don’t have a knack for it, why does that matter? What has it cost you? Absolutely nothing.

So is it failure that scares us, or something else?

Maybe the reality is we don’t feel like we are good enough. We feel like phonies, that if we put something out there, people will see us as such – that we are not experts. We are simply amateurs, and they might scoff at us.

Or maybe it’s the actual shipping of your idea or work that scares you. Because in order to make it work, in order to get it started, you have to tell someone about it. You have to try and get someone to bite.

And they might say no.

Why does this terrify us? It’s just one person, or two, or ten. But you only need one person to say yes in order to get the ball rolling.

And if no one says yes, then make better work, make different work, until someone says yes.

Ask yourself today what you are really afraid of, then see it for what it is and act.

by Nathan Coumbe

What is a teacher’s purpose?

Is it to impart knowledge and information? We have Google for that; it’s easier than ever to acquire both.

Is it to lecture and teach the right answer to put down on a test? What happens when a question or problem has multiple possible answers? Or no right answer?

Education, and by extension a teacher’s job, is meant to teach students how to think critically, to judge the truth or fallacy of an argument or piece of information, to garner understanding. It is not to answer the student’s question, “will this be on the test?”

At the most fundamental level, a teacher’s purpose is to teach her students how to learn and to nurture a life-long love of learning and creativity. It is the job of a teacher to ensure that, when her students have left her tutelage, the students will be able to read, watch, or listen to something; gather correct information from the material; synthesize it into their own understanding; then utilize the knowledge or skill learned.

Let us all remember our true purpose each day.

by Nathan Coumbe

Be my eyes, Harry!

I’m on a Harry Potter kick, it seems, but I love well-written literature…I can’t help it. When I was reading the other night, I was struck with the thought of how Harry serves as the “eyes” of us non-magic folk in discovering the wonderful world J.K. Rowling crafted for us. Instead of telling us a story, she let us live it out through Harry.

Think about it – had Harry grown up in a magical household, the Harry Potter series would have been quite boring to read. For instance, remember the first time in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire when Harry (and us, the readers) hears about “splinching”, a situation in which part of a witch or wizard is left behind when they disappear from one place and reappear in another? Had Harry been brought up with this rather common knowledge, in the wizarding world at least, Arthur Weasley would not have explained it to him, which allowed us to learn about it by extension. J.K. Rowling would instead have had to break from the story, become a narrator, and say something along the lines of, “Oh by the way, reader, ‘splinching’ is…” By writing Harry as a newcomer to the wizarding world, one character explains it to another character, and we as readers never have to come out of the magic that occurs when we lose ourselves in an excellent story.

Rowling crafted a useful literary tool into her story by using Harry as the window into the world of magic, rather than simply telling us a story. It’s never too late to appreciate an artist’s ingenuity.

by Nathan Coumbe

The Weasleys: two sides of the passion coin

One of my all-time favorite literary creations is the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling. It is a story that grew up at the same time I did, and it still brings me great joy today. Because I know it so well, and because it doesn’t overstimulate my mind as I am trying to wind down, I tend to read it before bed. While reading Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, I was struck by the inadvertent focus on passions in the first few chapters.

Two different ideals on passion are illustrated in the book. Arthur Weasley, the father of all the red-headed Weasleys, is obsessed with all-things Muggles. He “collects plugs,” and his wife thinks him crazy for it. The Weasley twins, Fred and George, are known far and wide for creating mischief and mayhem wherever they go. I want to unpack this a bit more.

Arthur Weasley has followed his passion (non-magic people) and made an entire career out of it. He works for the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office in the Ministry of Magic, protecting the Muggles he loves from witches and wizards who would do them harm. His hobbies at home are all based around Muggle items, from cars to plugs and electricity. And yet, even though he has followed his passion, his family is impoverished.

Throughout the series, we are constantly reminded how little the Weasleys have because their father seemingly has no ambition. I don’t believe this is the case; he simply followed his passion down a deep rabbit hole without ever paying attention to how he could monetize his curiosity.

Career coach Dan Miller often talks about the three-legged stool model of work: for it to work well, there must be passion, talent, and a way to make money from it. Arthur has failed to build that third leg of the stool, and his family has suffered from it. This is by no means a warning against following your passions and talents; it is simply a reminder that you must pay attention to how you can make a living from them, or else you simply have a hobby.

Now let’s turn our attention to the Weasley twins. There is no doubt that they are brilliant witches and wizards. They hold their own plenty of times against other witches and wizards in combat. Not only that, but Hermione Granger herself comments at one point on how impressive and advanced their magic must be for their magical gag products to work.

They are obviously immensely creative and talented in their passions, which seem to be mischief-making and comedy. Yes, it gets them in trouble at school, but only because their school, like our own modern educational system, is a place to sit quietly, obey, and pass the end-of-year exams. Their mother, Molly, is constantly chastising them about not getting enough high exam marks, about causing too much trouble, about not being ambitious like their father and choosing comedy and invention over working for the Ministry.

How is that for irony? For one, government work, whether magical or not, has never been the most creative of workspaces, nor, in my experience, do many people in government tend to be overly ambitious and concerned with making a difference in, or leaving a mark on, the world. I find it fascinating how closely this relates to us in the real world. Our schools stifle creativity and individual differences among their students; we encourage them, not to pursue what they excel in, but to pursue what will pay well and be the “secure,” as if such a thing even exists anymore in the information age. We focus on improving everyone’s weaknesses to make everyone more like the average student, rather than focusing on strengths so that we can all stand out and achieve our unique purpose.

If the Weasley twins had followed their dad’s example, or their mother’s advice, they would never have lived up to their true potential. By book six, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, the twins succeeded in creating Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes, opening up a highly successful magical joke shop, and becoming fabulously wealthy in the process.

Let’s take a lesson from the Weasleys today. Have the focus of Arthur Weasley, but the ambition of Fred and George. I strongly encourage you to follow your curiosity wherever it leads. Ignore the naysayers, but keep in mind the idea of the three-legged stool; all three legs must be present or you only have a hobby, like Arthur Weasley. Find a way to monetize and maximize your obsession, and you will be successful beyond your wildest dreams.

by Nathan Coumbe

Reaping excellence

I came across a little maxim yesterday that got my mind going, so I wanted to share.

“Sow a thought, reap an action; sow an action, reap a habit; sow a habit, reap a character; sow a character, reap a destiny.”

There is also a quote that pairs nicely with this maxim:

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

– Aristotle

What is it that you repeatedly want to do? If you did it often enough, do you believe you would truly develop excellence in that habit?

Perhaps you should ask a related question: if what you are doing now isn’t something in which you want to develop excellence, what do you repeatedly think about? Once you have an idea in mind, you can then apply it to the maxim.

For example, let’s say that a person is constantly thinking about art, but only thinking, never creating any herself. We’ll start there.

“Sow a thought…” she is constantly thinking about and admiring the artistic work of others.

“Reap an action…” the aspiring artist decides to take drawing lessons and vows to draw a little bit every day, no matter how small it might be.

“Sow an action…” drawing each and everyday becomes second nature.

“Reap a habit…” she no longer even thinks about if she will draw today; the only thought on her mind is what to draw. A habit is developed.

“Sow a habit…” drawing has become second-nature to her now. It’s as habitual as brushing her teeth or eating.

“Reap a character…” she has become, intentionally or not, an artist. It is now who she is, a fundamental feature of her character. She is now one of the people she once admired.

“Sow a character…” you can see the rest. Her destiny is whatever she decides to make it at this point. She has already developed the skills and habits needed to carry her far down the path of artistic success, whatever she decides that looks like for her. Perhaps it is a career in art, or perhaps it is just a wonderfully enjoyable hobby. But it is now who she is.

So, what is it about which you constantly think? How can you turn those thoughts into action, and then practice those actions often enough until habits form and a certain character you want develops?

“We are what we repeatedly do…”

Decide and act on that in which you strive to be excellent.