Tag / resistance

by Nathan Coumbe

Courage starts with you

It’s tempting to ask why people who have more power than you don’t use that power to change the situation.

But what about you? Why can’t you muster the courage to write a letter, make a phone call, or attend an event?

If you’re afraid to do something small in service to the change you want to make, how can you possibly expect someone else to do something bigger and potentially more consequential?

Often, the bigger the impact an action has, the more courage is required to act.

So, you must start small. Start with yourself, with the small things you know you can do.

Be brave in the little moments to model courage for others when the big moments come.

by Nathan Coumbe

What are you afraid of?

“One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he could do what he was afraid he couldn’t do.”

–Henry Ford

In what areas do you doubt yourself?

What is the resistance telling you right now you cannot do?

Write it down; call it what it is. “Notice and name” as the folks over at Precision Nutrition like to say.

Don’t judge yourself; don’t feel guilty. Just say what it is. Then start asking why.

Why are you afraid?

You might find the answer surprising…you might also find that you have no answer and, perhaps, no reason to fear.

What one thing could you do right now to move away from the fear? What change do you desperately want to make but are too afraid to take the first step?

You can do it.

by Nathan Coumbe

What makes you uncomfortable?

Resiliency is a skill that can be developed through practice. The first step is choosing to practice. 

What makes you uncomfortable? The answer to that question will help determine where to start.

I hate asking people to make special accommodations for me: I always feel I am inconveniencing the other person (I rarely am), or that I am being a very annoying customer (if they think so, that’s their choice). So when my wife and I started to drastically reduce our waste production, I was uncomfortable with some of the suggestions she made. 

A story…

My favorite example took place at our local Mexican restaurant: they have delicious salsa that we would buy in large tubs to take home and use during the week. These tubs were made of styrofoam and had plastic lids. My wife suggested that I take one of our many empty glass jars and ask for salsa to be placed inside. I was so reluctant, so uncomfortably scared to simply ask. It felt dangerous, even though the worst thing that could happen was to receive no as an answer. No danger at all, but my mind made it feel dangerous.

After numerous arguments (I was scared, remember?), I grudgingly went to the restaurant and made the request. The host looked at me curiously, but he acquiesced and placed the salsa in our jar. He even went a step further and informed me that there were no preservatives in the salsa; it would only keep for a week or so. A wave of relief washed over me. 

But wait! 

The next week, when I went back for more salsa, there was a sign on the front counter. 

“$2.99 jars of salsa to go. Bring the jar back for a $0.99 refill.”

The host, who was also the manager, bought a stock of small glass jars and decided to sell them. He was actively encouraging people to reuse the jars while also proactively choosing to reduce the waste his restaurant produced. 

By choosing (i.e. being forced by my incredible wife) to do something that made me uncomfortable, my wife and I achieved one of our small waste reduction goals. But the most inspiring thing was the change it created in someone else. 

Seek out discomfort in all areas of your life. It makes you stronger mentally. Discomfort in the gym makes you stronger physically. 

Other people avoid discomfort, which means you will be doing things others won’t. The intersection of discomfort and action creates change the world desperately needs. 

Change makes things better. Seeking out discomfort makes things better. 

What makes you uncomfortable?

Go do that.

by Nathan Coumbe

It may not feel like much

It may not feel like much when it’s all you can physically do.

I’m speaking, of course, on producing, practicing, or creating when there just isn’t enough time in the day to get much of anything done. On those days, all you can do is all you can do.

And all you can do is good enough.

Write a few sentences instead of fretting over not writing a chapter.

Practice your instrument for 15 or 20 minutes instead of saying, “screw it” because you didn’t master an entire piece today.

Draw a doodle comic, not some magnificent portrait.

Go for a 10 minute walk rather than beating yourself up over the fact that you didn’t spend an hour at the gym.

Incremental improvement. Streaks. Baby steps. 5 minutes here; another 8 minutes there. This is how progress is made.

Change your mindset; realize that you are building mental fortitude and creating habits when you do just a little something each day rather than adopting an all-or-nothing mindset.

You might feel like you suck. You don’t. You’re doing a heck of a lot better than the person that decided not to show up today.

And if you can’t do anything at all, wipe the slate clean and show up again tomorrow.

by Nathan Coumbe

Overcome the resistance

Steven Pressfield talks about “the resistance” in his book The War of Art when discussing the mental blocks that Creatives encounter during their artistic pursuits. This is that fear in the back of your mind, the one telling you there is no use in trying what you are attempting to do as it might not work.

Every Creative goes through this; you are not alone.

My resistance is telling me now that my business endeavors might not work out; it’s trying to convince me that I am not skilled enough, not knowledgeable enough, or not important enough for people to use me as a resource in their creative endeavors.

Don’t listen to the resistance. All you can do is press forward.

Launch your ideas; reach out to potential clients and customers; let the public see your work.

Beat the resistance down, and when it comes back, do it again.